TVO Original | Picture My Face: The Story of Teenage Head, Canada’s Notorious Punk Band

“A beautiful film…Ultimately a wonderful celebration of friendship. Thanks for the laughs, the thrills, the tears and some of the best fucking rock n roll music ever made.”– Steve Kane, President Warner Music Canada

TVO and Feltfilm are pleased to announce the world broadcast and online premiere of TVO Original Picture My Face: The Story of Teenage Head, Tuesday, November 3, 2020 at 9 pm ET on TVO and This relevant and poignant documentary tells the story of Canada’s glamour punk band, Teenage Head, determined to re-enter the limelight some 40 years after causing legendary punk rock riots at Toronto’s Ontario Place. But first they need to save their founder and lead guitarist Gord Lewis from crippling depression. Features appearances by Marky Ramone, Rob Baker (The Tragically Hip), and renowned punk writers Jon Savage and Nina Antonia.


‘A Purple Thread: The Supernatural Doom of Oscar Wilde.’

Pre-Order Here from Fiddler’s Green

Unlike some essays, ‘A Purple Thread’ was not commissioned but evolved at its own pace. The Oscar Wilde market is already brimming with product including books, articles and films, even ornaments. Wilde has infiltrated the mainstream as martyred poet, gay rights pioneer and Victorian dandy, his flame tended by the likes of Matthew Sturgis who recently ensured Oscar’s posthumous longevity with a poised, authoritative biography. Preferring the obscure and unsung meant that Mr Wilde was never going to join my stable of subjects for a full length volume. Besides, being a ragamuffin of the literary world meant that I would never score the kind of book deal that such a venture would require. Unlike Oliver Twist in the workhouse, I never ask for more, only different, chronicling the waifs and strays that haunt the twilight borders and are of no account to sale teams at larger publishers. 

My favourite book length account of Oscar Wilde has to be the largely forgotten ‘Aspects of Wilde’ by Vincent O’Sullivan. Originally published in 1936, O’Sullivan who knew both Oscar and Lord Alfred Douglas gives us snap shots, insights and recollections in his quirky account. Written years before Oscar’s ‘Sainthood’ O’Sullivan’s ‘Aspects’ is kinder in tone to Lord Alfred Douglas than most  contemporary books. An expert in the field of Wilde studies informed me that prior to 1960, ‘Bosie’ Douglas was not reviled in print, in the way he is now* (*Aleister Crowley being the exception to the rule). The simple device of creating a foe for the hero to rise up against is usually reserved for cinema but works a treat in sustaining the Wilde myth.  If everyone had a copy of ‘Aspects’ Lord Alfred might be less denigrated but alas they do not and Vincent O’Sullivan went to a pauper’s grave in Paris, in 1940. One can safely assume that Oscar never paid Vincent back the money he gave him so that he could be with Bosie in Italy. It’s just as likely that O’Sullivan would have demurred repayment from one of his heroes. Sadly, Vincent remains a ghost of his era, his work occasionally reprinted in anthologies of the supernatural, to which he was prone. Whilst ‘Aspects of Wilde’ is not a paranormal tome, O’Sullivan’s spooky sensibility is tangible and proved to be the inspiration for ‘A Purple Thread: The Supernatural Doom of Oscar Wilde.’ One paragraph in particular, where the author notes that Aubrey Beardsley was amongst many who believed that to own any of Oscar’s books was unlucky, stayed with me, just as the music from a song does, playing over and over. 

Was Oscar Wilde under a doom? 

We all like to believe that we are at the helm of our own destiny, steering a course driven by free-will. Yet sometimes it appears that fate plays its part, something that Oscar grasped early on in his Gothic poem ‘The Harlot’s House’ where the dancers are compared to automatons whose movements are governed by invisible hands. ‘Then turning to my love I said, “The dead are dancing with the dead, the dust is whirling with the dust.” Which has proved to be Oscar Wilde’s afterlife – a drama of unquiet spirits who still manage to enthral us, a shadow play that never ends………

Upon completion, ‘A Purple Thread’ loitered in the wings, its future uncertain, too long for a magazine article, too short for a book, perfect for a novelette though hardly anyone publishes them. 

Have you ever tried to get something off the ground and no matter what you do, how hard you try, everything is against it? As if life is saying, ‘Sorry, can’t oblige right now’ so you let it go. There’s no point in banging your head against the wall if it’s not the right time and obstacles manifest in all directions. The dust however continued to whirl with the dust, prompting Clint Marsh, the creator and editor of ‘Fiddler’s Green’ a charming journal hailing from Berkeley, to make contact. A heady pot-pourri of the esoteric and olde-worlde, decadent and quaint, ‘A Purple Thread’ had found its forever home in the Peculiar Parish of Fiddler’s Green, with the able assistance of artist Nathaniel Winter-Hebert whose marvellous illustrations have brought an extra dimension to the project. I’d always dreamed of having my work illustrated and am grateful to both Nathaniel for his lively interpretations and Clint for creating something quite magical and without precedent. 

Please Kill Me interviews Nina Antonia

Johnny Thunders photo by Nikki Sudden

Beth Hall for Please Kill Me interviews Nina Antonia about Johnny Thunders and her officially authorized biography. Read it here.

The Prettiest Star eBook

“Glamorous teen heartthrob Brett Smiley had the looks and the talent of a future superstar, but fate had different plans for him. As much the work of a detective as a biographer, The Prettiest Star, Nina Antonia’s expert excavation of the life of Smiley tells one of the most fascinating and tragic ‘what if’ stories of the rock era.” ~ Richard Metzger 

Previously out of print since 2005, The Prettiest Star: Whatever Happened to Brett Smiley? is now available as an eBook on Kindle with an enhanced photo gallery.

Sold Worldwide on Amazon.


Buy it from Amazon.

The epitome of Fey, ‘Beautiful’ Brett Smiley was primed for fame in the frenetic era of Glam but success was illusory. A former child actor, Brett had everything including a Mephistophelean manager, Andrew Loog Oldham who had steered the Rolling Stones to mega-stardom. Meanwhile, in Liverpool, Nina Antonia, a disenfranchised teenager witnessed Smiley’s sole television appearance in the UK. Interviewed by a concerned Russell Harty, the fate of the young singer was already in jeopardy. With a one way ticket to the boulevard of broken dreams, Brett was to become a missing piece of Nina’s childhood, until their paths crossed, almost 30 years later.

Book Design/Layout: Beth Hall,

Cover Artwork: colours of the dark,

The Prettiest Star by Nina Antonia: officially authorised glad-rags & ephemera by colours of the dark:

‘The Chap’… Dark Angels: Darcy Sullivan interviews Nina Antonia

Prior to lockdown, I was interviewed by the sartorially splendid Darcy Sullivan for the equally dandified spring edition of ‘The Chap.’ Darcy asked some unusually pertinent questions that included a fine quota of Thunder’s related queries and also provided the opportunity to recollect seeing Quentin Crisp in conversation at the Royal Court in Liverpool. Crisp was the first author I’d seen address an audience and he was as you might expect, very witty and engaging. He was also most  gracious when the time came for me to get a copy of ‘The Naked Civil Servant’ signed. Pete Burns was also getting his copy signed. Both gone now in the twinkling of gloriously painted eyes that recall the mad decadent verse of Edmund Gosse: 

‘Prince-jewellers, whose facet-rhymes combine/ All hues that glow, all rays that shift & shine/ Farewell thy song is sung, thy splendour fled.’……….

Johnny Thunders – Complete Works – the Art of Cosa Nostra edited by Kadoi The Heartbreak and Hiroshi The Golden Arm

This informative and lavishly illustrated book is out now.

Includes the four versions of In Cold Blood, two versions of Too Much Too Soon and the Johnny Thunders Sleeve Notes by Nina Antonia as well as her interview with Brian Young. Thank you, Hiroshi and congrats!

‘Incurable’ book launch at Gay’s The Word, August 6th, 2019

Photo take from Darcy Sullivan’s Channel on YouTube

Moments away from the snarling frenzy of traffic on the main road and into the quieter arteries of Bloomsbury, a sense of the past still lingers. Once an oasis of creative bohemia, the area has managed to hang on to its identity, there are second- hand book shops, coffee bars where you can hear Jonathan Richman and Roy Orbison whilst corner pubs feature some of the original Victorian exteriors, sea green and damson purple tiles glimmering in the late afternoon sun as they have done for the last century or so.  I am nervous and suggest to my companions, ‘Lord’ & ‘Lady’ Darcy that we venture to the small park on the next block from ‘Gays the Word’ bookshop, where we will be launching ‘Incurable’ – the selected writings of Lionel Johnson, featuring a biographical essay and some photographs as old as the pubs. (Available via Strange Attractor Press.)  I wonder if Lionel, a desperate tippler, ever drank round here. The vast Gothic hulk, The Russell Hotel, probably belonged to the family of one of his dearest friends, Francis, Earl Russell. It is a fascinating monolith, the exterior decorated with plump garlanded cherubs and shell-shocked Merlads coiled around lights that no longer work. How fantastic it must have once looked, like a magical ship sailing on a sea of night.

London has become a very difficult place to live in, uncomfortable, over-priced, and competitive – circumstances keep me here but it also has so many poetic ghosts fluttering around like spectral white moths that I am inclined to stay until I too join them. It is nearly twilight, the day giving itself up to the evening and I’ve begun to procrastinate – part of the pre-event ritual. I insist politely that we stop off at the little park to watch the last of the sun’s rays glancing off the leaves on the tall trees, like tiny golden darts. Lord Darcy, dashing dandy about town, press officer for the Oscar Wilde society, who will be asking the questions that need to be asked, reminds me that we really should convene to ‘Gays the Word.’

Gays The Word distance shot.JPG

I’ve done many literary events over the years but none have been as enjoyable as this one or as thoughtfully prepared, a big thank you to Uli who did all the organising. What makes an evening special? The venue has much to do with it, ‘Gay’s the Word’ being a historical and community landmark, as well as a Queer safe space and a very fine bookshop. The audience are brimming with good-will; Jamie from Strange Attractor gives a stirring speech about how independent publishers and independent bookshops are part of the same precious fabric. Lord Darcy’s moustache is impeccable as is his knowledge of Oscar Wilde. One of the microphone’s break, but that happens at every event, usually I blame the ghost of Johnny Thunders but tonight it’s Lionel Johnson being the little trickster, despite his melancholy visage on multiple copies of ‘Incurable’ taking up most of the shop window display. The past always interweaves with the future, however, and just as we are about to start, Walter Lure arrives with Mick Rossi, currently playing in Walter’s LAMF band. I cannot believe that a Heartbreaker has attended one of my gigs!! But stranger things have happened. They always do.

Thoughts on the delightful write-up of ‘Incurable’ in the Gay & Lesbian Review.


Of the one thing that Lionel Johnson was certain, it is that we all fall under the heel of history to be as mist. Even in life, Lionel was particularly misty and acutely morbid, haunting boneyards as a schoolboy, not out of any ghoulish proclivity but to find the answers to eternity: ‘I have tried, oh, so earnestly tried, in utter faith to make the dead hear me, feel for me, comfort me.’ Thankfully, he was met with silence, aside from his footsteps echoing on ancient stone in the mausoleum and charnel houses of Winchester & Oxford. Only the best for Lionel! One senses through his poems and letters that he had presumed always to be ill-fated. Perhaps a doctor had muttered bleak predictions on encountering a child so unbelievably ethereal in comparison to his robust brothers, who like their father, would achieve military renown. Alas, Lionel because of his drinking, didn’t achieve literary longevity although he was well-regarded, no lesser than his old friend and associate, W.B Yeats publishing a selection of his poetry whilst T.S Eliot was an admirer but then Johnson simply petered out, like one of those candles he carried on his midnight cemetery flits.

In part, the Wilde juggernaut has driven rough-shod over any awkward blips in the myth making, Lionel Johnson, enigmatic and fey, elusive and reclusive, has been the will-o’-the-wisp in the drawing room at Oscar’s house in Tite Street. But it’s not easy pinning down someone who was a ghost in life. The theft of a considerable amount of correspondence between Lionel and Lord Alfred Douglas would have gone some way to redressing the balance, of fleshing out their ‘special’ friendship as well as possibly giving a different perspective on ‘Bad Boy Bosie’ who couldn’t help be what he was – a fraught, spoilt, love-hungry, profligate aristocrat. That which made him appealing to Oscar Wilde, also made him appalling.

The secrets that Douglas and Johnson shared will most probably remain that way. Thankfully, Lionel Johnson can still speak to us, through his poetry and essays. Which is why Alan Contreras’ generous and thoughtful write up in no lesser publication than The Gay & Lesbian review is all the more important, for it gives Lionel, silenced by time and circumstances, a voice once again.

Read the review –

Washington Post Review


Being a literary zine enthusiast as well as a contributor, I was delighted by Michael Dirda’s excellent article that appeared in the Washington Post this week. With great aplomb, Michael has chosen the choicest of titles: ‘The Weird Fiction Review’, ‘Wormwood’ ‘Faunus’ (The journal of the Friends of Arthur Machen) from Swan River Press comes ‘The Green Book ‘& as a post-script, ‘Zagava’.

I take full responsibility for having never pursued career goals, writing was always a vocation and the direction it took was where my passions led me. Which was frequently overdrawn. Having spent the last two years in relative obscurity, writing about a relatively obscure Victorian poet, Lionel Johnson, I was thrilled when ‘Wormwood’ accepted the feature. An article without a home becomes a paper orphan and Lionel had suffered quite enough in real life to face more rejection. Thanks to Wormwood and Michael Dirda, he was able to take his first bow on the pages of the Washington Post, as was I.

Nico & The last Testament of Doctor Demetrius

Nico Purple.JPG

(photograph by Danny Fields. Garden of the Portobello Hotel, London)

Monday’s full blue blood moon weaved its strange magic. Few rock tomes stand the test of time but James Young’s ‘Songs They Never Play on the Radio’ will always have a permanent place on the bookshelf. Some thirty years have slipped by since Young played keyboards for Nico, then penned a slender yet mischievous memoir of his adventures touring with the Moon Goddess. Nico always managed to escape the modish, even if she started her career as a model, before Andy Warhol inducted her into the Velvet Underground as their resident chanteuse. Her solitary aura and aloof stance separated her from her more frenetic band-mates. Reincarnating as a solo artist, she morphed into The Moon Goddess, composing haunting dreamscapes on a harmonium.  Art can only survive time’s relentless harvest if it touches upon eternal themes. Nico’s music, a silvered interior wilderness carved out of night and thronged by shadows can never date because it is unclassifiable whilst being Gothic in the manner of Pugin. Some years ago, I interviewed Alan Wise, who pivotal to Manchester’s post punk music resurgence, left his unique imprint on both the Hacienda and Factory Records. However, it was as a Nico aficionado that I sought Wise out. Featured as ‘Doctor Demetrius’ in Young’s tome, Wise managed Nico in the last years of her life, though he was clearly in the thrall of the Moon Goddess as this rare and insightful interview attests. Like Nico, Alan Wise has since gone over the frozen borderline, though I have no doubt he is still in the stately procession of the Moon Goddess.

 Alan Wise Interview

(with some words from Ari, at conclusion)

N: When you first met Nico what where you doing?

A: It was 1981, at the time I was running nights at a club called Rafters and she was booked to play there by Mike Hince who worked for Rough Trade.  He introduced a lot of interesting stuff to us. I didn’t really know who she was and when he made the booking I said, ‘Who is he?’  What happened was I saw her arriving with her boyfriend, Robert, from the Scars, a young Scottish guy. She was carrying her harmonium and I was just going out to get something to eat at the Italian restaurant next door. I liked the look of them, they looked interesting, bohemian. I said ‘Would you like something to eat? Are you hungry?’ Of course they were. We went next door for something to eat.

N: Where her circumstances quite precarious?

A: Yes, very, they were travelling on buses, doing gigs for money, there wasn’t that great a fee, she had a tour of the North to do so I went with her, to look after her. Both she and Robert were hopeless; they had no sense of organisation or the money side of it, and no access to legal supplies methadone.

N: There must have been something about Nico that made you want to be act like this … be valiant?

A: I liked her instantly I thought she was a very interesting character. I only got involved in entertainment to meet interesting characters. She was strong but vulnerable, bright, charming. I found her somewhere to live, she’d been touring but she liked Manchester because of the Victorian architecture. Initially she was staying in a Polish hotel in Whalley Range (what do you get for your trouble and pain?) the Polex owned by a war hero, it was very cheap, she didn’t have much money. After that, she came to live in Didsbury with me, only briefly, then she moved to the other side of Manchester, a beautiful area called Prestwich Park (house was called Moresby) it was Victorian.

I remember when Gregory Corso was staying with her, it was funny, they had this banter, they’d watch old films, ‘King Solomon’s Mines’ and Nico would say ‘I wish I had a mine’ and Gregory would respond ‘Sorry Nico, I can’t help you, I haven’t got a mind’ ‘I didn’t say ‘Mind’ Gregory, I said ‘Mine’…’Gregory was with us for about a year, he was sending letters home  to his wife telling her that he ‘Staying with a lovely couple in the Lake District. I said to him ‘You’re hardly staying with a lovely couple in the Lake District’ He said ‘Alan a gentleman doesn’t read someone else’s mail.

N: Did she talk much about the past?

A: All the time, Nico’s life was the past. Berlin, the war, what she’d done, modelling, why she didn’t like it. I spoke to Andrew Loog Oldham about her; he said that when he’d met, she’d been very ‘Harvey Nichol’s’ meaning nice clothes, bright attire, fairly upbeat, what you might consider a ‘Lightweight’ but her personality changed because of her opiate use. She got into that culture.  Had she not got into opiates she may simply have been a light hearted German Folk Singer, as ‘I’m Not Sayin’ suggests. The heavy Marlene Dietrich stance came later. Oldham said her character wasn’t like that at all. She could be moody, but I’d have said it was because of all the drugs she took over the years. Her mood altered every few seconds but she could talk and be charming and witty. She said what she did and got on with it. She was one of the last Left Bank Bohemians. She read good books, although she hadn’t had a formal education in the sense that she hadn’t gone to university, which she regretted and said was because of the war, she always read good books. Dostoyevsky, Solzyenitschen? (Gulag Archipelago) quality English writers. She liked being solitary but she’d also socialise but she wasn’t a snob, she’d hang out at the local pool hall, strike up a conversation with a bum.

N: What happened to her harmonium?

A: Ari, (Nico’s son) took it back to Paris but his girlfriend sold it; it was here for a long time.

N: Ari is staying with you? What kind of a relationship is it?

A: Depressing (laughs) It’s not a permanent thing, he was poorly in France so I’m looking after him. Ari’s memoirs were very well received in France. He’s decided he’d like to get it released in England if he can get a translator. He’d love a deal for it in the UK. He can’t remember what he signed for with the French publisher, in that respect he’s just like his mother. We’re not friends, were family, I’ve known him for so long. His mum was family to me, and so is Ari, it’s a family affair. I remember some Dutch promoters came to see us, they said ‘Not only do you work together, you live in the same house.’ Our working relationship wasn’t business, it was family, we didn’t have a proper contract, we fought and made up like family.

N: Is James Young’s book a true reflection?

A: No but it’s comical, I helped him write it. We decided to write a funny book that was a bit like our experiences, but the publisher didn’t want it done like that and the only way they were going to pay an advance was to finish the book as a biography but it’s not an accurate account. Life was much more comical than that and she did very nice venues, you can’t tell me that the Palais De Beaux Arts and some of the Italian theatres we played were dumps. James portrayed the down side of pop life because it was attractive, of course it was representative of certain aspects, but it ignored an awful lot of other things.

N: Any truth to the story that Nico wanted to be a florist?

A: That was towards the end, she wanted to work in a flower shop until she found out the wages. She went to a florists to ask how much they paid. They told her £150, she said ‘I can’t live on a £150 a day’. They said no, it’s £150 a week. It was a local place, she’d worked in a florists before and she liked flowers.

N: Marriage proposal from a Hassidic admirer?

A: That was really comical, he was about a 110. He owned the house she lived in. What she used to do was the light the fires for him on a Saturday. Jewish law states that one shouldn’t do any work on a Saturday, so they invite non-Jewish people in. Incredible as it sounds she volunteered to light the fires for him and put the oven on. She’d done this as a child. But he asked her to marry him. She seemed to think it was serious.

One time she was in hospital, she had septicaemia, it was 1983. The hospital was in Crumsall. She would dominate the ward by turning the television over when ‘Coronation Street’ came on. She put on intellectual, educational programmes that no one else wanted to see. When I went to see her, she gave me the run down on the ward ‘That women there, she is such a moron she watches rubbish on TV’ ‘This one reads a terrible paper’ ‘That one over there, her husband is always very noisy’ but then she pointed to the women in the bed next to her ‘And this one sleeps with a tiger’ ‘You what’? ‘Or maybe I’m imagining it’ She didn’t know but the fact that this woman was sleeping with a tiger seemed perfectly acceptable to Nico. I remember when she used to do TV interviews, she’d be asked a question, like ‘Would you like a car?’ then they’d go on to another subject, say for instance ‘Rome’ but she’d still be responding to the car question, while they were on to ‘Rome being an ancient civilisation’ She’d say ‘About 2000 years’ and of course it would sound like she’d asked for a 2000 year old car. The conversation she was carrying on in her head was 15 minutes behind everyone else. Looking back, I think she has more talent now that I did then. She wasn’t a rock singer, her strongest work was her own, ‘The End’ ‘Marble Index’’ she was really an avant -garde torch singer in the Dietrich tradition. Her songs were sort of folky, fairy tale, following a Germanic tradition. At the time she wasn’t liked in Germany but now she’s considered a star there. She didn’t like playing Germany, she found it boring and the promoters always wanted to stick to time, they were always so dramatic. She wasn’t rock n’ roll. She did one programme and she said, ‘I don’t know anything about rock and roll; I don’t know why you are asking me.” She was more interested in classical music. She liked modern classical composers, she like Max Bruch, but the greatest one for her was Mahler, the greatest piece of music for her was Mahler’s 5th symphony. She liked the Velvet Underground, Lou Reed and The Doors. One time we were travelling across the Alps and she took over from me, then after a little while she said, ‘I can see Jim’s face in the road’ The rest of us said’ what about the fucking road Nico, we’re getting out’ the whole group got out and waited by the side of the mountain rather than travel with her. She carried on with Barbara, her faithful companion, driving.

N: The way you describe Nico it’s almost as if she lived in a hallucinogenic fairy story

A: She lived like her act, there was no separate persona to the person you saw on stage to the one at home except she wanted to change her name back to Christa Paffgen, she said I’m not Nico, I’m Christa, Nico was a photographer who gave me that name. She was getting a bit tired of the Nico persona.

N: Do you think Manchester afforded her some shelter from that?

A: We lived in Manchester and in London, 29 Effra Road; it was me, Nico and John Cooper Clarke.

N: Did you set up the Martin Hannet sessions?

A: Yes, he was a friend of mine, it was called ‘Procession’ it was a long time since then, we only made one studio album and one live album, which sold a lot. One was ‘Camera Obscura’ which came out on Beggars Banquet, produced by John Cale with the Faction which was James Young, Graham Dowdall & Mike Hinc.

N: You helped her get a script that must have made things easier for her?

A: Yes, she had a doctor who prescribed her methadone

N: The letter?

A: That was a weird occurrence, we went back to her hold out with a BBC camera crew, this was a few months ago, we returned to the house on Prestwich Park South,’ Moresby’ it’s called. It’s a big Victorian house; Nico lived in the upper part of the house, the new owner restored into one about 20 years ago. When she saw the BBC crew, the owner came down. She said, ‘You must have come about Nico; she left her room in a mess’. I said to her ‘Do you mean to tell me you haven’t tidied it up in all that time?’ ‘No, I left it the same but I found a letter’. Unfortunately, the BBC crew nicked it but it was written by Nico to Alain Delon asking him to look after Ari. It was never sent.

N: She must have had some sort of premonition. Ibiza was just meant to be a holiday?

A: Yes, she did her last show in Berlin, they always say that where you do your last show is your hometown and then she went to Ibiza. Ari was with her. She went cycling on a hot day and had a stroke; it wasn’t the fall off the bicycle that killed her. It was the stroke. The last person to see her, by a strange twist, was Peter Hook from New Order. New Order where on their way to the airport and they saw her at a café and waved and she waved back. Very strange.

N: How best would you guide me to write about Nico?

A: You have to go back to her origins, Germany, the war, Berlin.

N: Dick Witts claimed she had a tortured relationship with her mother.

A: She loved her mother very much, sometimes she was unwell but she loved her. Dick Witts claimed to have known Nico well, but he only met her once, she went to his flat but she was uncertain as to whether she wanted him as a biographer.

Nico Cig.JPG

Ari: ‘I have only good memories of my mother. She was a very funny character she had a great sense of humour. She loved me very much, we had a special relationship. It was unique, almost like man and wife, although nothing incestuous, although people sometimes thought we were married. We had an artistic relationship, she was a great lady and I miss her very much. I was with her when she died. To me she was just my mother, a great woman who always tried to protect me.’